


Ittekimasu.

by artartdowndown, Koayyy



Category: Granblue Fantasy (Video Game)
Genre: Lucio gives Sandalphon PTSD, What Makes The Sky Blue spoilers (all three)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 17:01:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18077426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artartdowndown/pseuds/artartdowndown, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Koayyy/pseuds/Koayyy
Summary: Sandalphon has looked death in the eyes and laughed before. He’s now the supreme primarch, and it wouldn’t take much for him to completely flip the world upside down. In fact, he was totally capable of causing another cataclysm, if he wanted to.In fact, it would have been easier for him to do that than open the door, and with his teary eyes, look the three of them in the eyes.-tl;dr Lucio gives Sandalphon PTSD





	Ittekimasu.

**Author's Note:**

> so my friend Koayyy thought it would be a good idea for me to post an edgy fic that i suddenly felt like writing at 11pm in a Burger King
> 
> this is all my angst for WMTSB rolled up into a 1k+ fic

The worst part wasn’t that he would have to wait a long, **long** time to see Lucifer again. He was over that, Sandalphon told himself.

 

It was that he had to wake up to a mockery of Lucifer every single day. Time seemed to grind to a human speed everyday he woke up and saw that bastard who did **one** thing out of the endless piles of favors that he owed to the others for helping him stop the war between the fallen. Hell, even seeing Olivia and Azazel made him less angry-

 

 _“Is this even anger?”_ , he would ask himself, _“or is it just regret that I couldn’t find a better way to bring him back?”_

 

 _“No, it’s definitely anger. Everything turned out for the best. I can see Lucifer again,”_ he would tell himself, _“even if it’s in a really long time.”_

 

Then he tells himself that he shouldn’t even mind Lucio. He’s the better being here.

 

It’s not because of seeing Lucio in the dining hall that he always turns around, walks back into his room during breakfast, and breaks down into tears, no. Such petty matters were below him, surely. He’s over Lucifer.

 

So why is it that he’s torn between his own desire to protect the skies and a death wish?

* * *

 

It takes a miracle to get him out of his suicidal slump. In fact, you could say that it takes a certain Singularity.

 

This Singularity comes knocking on his dorm door, along with a red lizard and a blue haired girl.

 

“Sandalphon? You there?”

“Grumblephoooon!”

“Sandalphon, are you okay?”

 

Sandalphon has looked death in the eyes and laughed before. He’s now the supreme primarch, and it wouldn’t take much for him to completely flip the world upside down. In fact, he was totally capable of causing another cataclysm, if he wanted to.

 

In fact, it would have been easier for him to do that than open the door, and with his teary eyes, look the three of them in the eyes straight.

 

He decides that he has to do it anyway, and as such, he drags his ball-and-chain restrained feet to the door, and with his stone cold hands, he opens the door and forces the most neutral look that he can make.

 

“What’s up, Singularitain?”

 

Gran sports a confused look but decides not to say anything.

 

“You’re not okay, are you?” Vyrn pipes up with a concerned voice.

 

“What makes you think that?”

 

“You just called Gran ‘Singularitain’, Confuddlephon.”

 

Sandalphon has a look of realization, and then embarrassment, and then sadness, and then neutrality. This switch of emotions on his face lasts for a total of half a second.

 

He decides to concede. “You know what? Just come in for a bit. I’ll… explain.”

 

He invites the three of them in, and they all look concerned as hell. Deep inside, he _knows_ he has to talk to them or he swears to god he’s going to break the hell down.

 

It has to be in his room.

 

After all, society and logic both dictate that it’s not a very wise choice to bawl your eyes out in the corridor.

* * *

 

Lyria is concerned, and that much is obvious by the way she’s clutching onto her dress and the way her face looks. The usual “sad Lyria” visage.

 

Vyrn has his hands and tail hanging while he’s fluttering midair.

 

Gran has his hands folded while he looks sternly upon Sandalphon.

 

Sandalphon doesn’t blame them. He knows they mean well, and this is their way of expressing it.

 

What he **does** feel is guilt for worrying them to such an extent that they have to come to his room to check in for his pity party. Thus, he decides to cut straight to the point.

 

Someone else does it for him, and it’s unexpectedly Lyria.

 

“It’s Lucio, isn’t it?”

 

The atmosphere in the room feels as if it’s filled with the exhaust from an airship’s tailpipe. Everybody is choking, yet no one says a thing, not until Sandalphon breaks the silence.

 

“It is.”

 

No one says anything when Sandalphon pushes those words out wearily.

 

“I’m so close yet so far away from Lucifer, and I’ve seen him, and I could’ve joined him, but I still want to be here, even if he’s so, so **far** away and I just want to have one more cup of coffee with him and talk to him and laugh with him about stupid jokes but instead I’m stuck here with a goddamn **impostor** who pretends he knows how I feel every morning while the real deal is stuck in what’s essentially purgatory and I hate this, I hate everything about this and I’m stuck in a goddamn void between staying here and straight up **killing myself** but I genuinely care about and love you guys too much to let go and you all have done so much for me and it would be selfish for me to up and leave and I--”

 

No one says anything when Sandalphon’s words start sounding totally incoherent.

No one says anything when Sandalphon starts trying to hold back the tears that he should have let go of in that paradise-like garden.

No one says anything when Sandalphon finally lets down his guard and mask down by, ironically, covering his face and yelling in anguish, in frustration, and in excruciating pain from being so close, yet so far, from someone he cared so much for.

 

After all, how could they even comprehend the pain he’s gone through?

They have no choice but to resort to giving him a group hug in hopes that it makes him feel loved and not alone, while he sobs and yells and whimpers into his hands.

 

It works, and despite the fact that it’s morning, Sandalphon doesn’t need to lie in bed and overthink his life in order to fall asleep, which he slowly does between his thoughts that are filled with seeing Lucifer again, and the comfortable warmth that surrounds him coming from two human beings and one small lizard-shaped creature, both of whom he knows genuinely cares about him, and not because he’s research material or some pawn in stupid angel politics.

 

He sleeps, dreamless, and it’s the best rest he has in a while.

* * *

 

He’s gently woken up from his sleep at 4 in the afternoon, not by another incident that some perverted sex-obsessed freak or evil twin of an angel has caused, but by the smell of coffee. He slowly sets himself into sitting position on his bed.

 

 _“This coffee smells horrible,”_ he thinks to himself. _“I love it.”_

 

He walks out to find absolutely nobody but Gran, Lyria, and Vyrn. Not a trace of any other crew member. He looks out of a window to find that they’re not at a certain crimson horizon or some place fracked with war, but the very comforting landscape of busy skyfarers and adventurers walking on the streets of Port Breeze. He spots several familiar faces from the Grandcypher on the streets. Io and Rosetta are near Sierokarte’s shop, Rackam and Eugen are at a streetside stall seemingly challenging each other to a drinking game…?

 

“Ah, you’re awake, huh? Just in time for coffee! Thought I’d give making it a try myself.” Gran spots him looking out the window, and beckons him over with a gesture to the table. He carries a big smile. “I thought a bit of so-called ‘alone time’ would be nice for you. And for us, in general. People need time to unwind, you know what I mean?”

 

“Thanks, Capta-”

 

“Gran is fine.”

 

Lyria and Vyrn are behind Gran snickering. Sandalphon decides to take a cup of coffee from Gran, not too hot or cold but comfortingly warm, and takes a sip. “It tastes horrendous,” and Sandalphon makes sure that Gran is fully aware of this fact by saying that with a joking scowl on his face.

 

“I beg your pardon?”

 

“Then beg.”

 

Sandalphon can’t keep up the act, and within seconds all of them are keeling over heartily laughing.

 

Sandalphon catches himself thinking that maybe, just maybe, this isn’t so bad after all.

 


End file.
